SHART part 1

i kinda delayed this entry.  and it's a pretty important event..maybe i delayed it coz i was too busy, ididnt think much of it, or i was too embarrassed..either way..my moms wanted me to post an entry regarding this situation...so here goes.

before i begin the entry, i would like to introduce a term that is not widely known here in the philippines..it is the term, "SHART". it is a mix of "fart and shit". it is the action of shit coming out of your butt when u fart...so with that being said, let's begin.

so im out on clinicals and i finish up assisting in the OR (not much assisting, just handed the surgeon his instruments) and i feel this like gassy/bubbly feeling in my stomach...i dont really think much of it..so i just fart and stuff like i usually do..and it relieves a little bit of the gas..so i exit the OR and walk out to meet my other classmates..and i start talkin to em while farting silently to relieve the gas..after a few minutes of pointless banter, i take my seat, play "unblock me" on my phone for a few minutes, when SUDDENLY i feel another bubbly in my stomach..being stupid and all, i thought it was regular bubbly feeling, so i stand up to make it look incognito and  i let one out............................THEN THE UNTHINKABLE HAPPENS.

i feel like a little air pocket got stuck in between my cheeks after i let it out..so i adjust my butt cheeks accordingly..then i start to feel this jelly-like feeling in alternating between my left and right butt-cheek..so im like.."  OH SHIT!!!"  so im like panicking now..but not showing it..and my classmates ask me, "dude, miguel..are you ok?" im like.."yeah, im good..i just had a good fart..that's all"  and then they say "did u just poop your pants?" and im thinking, maybe it was just water (stupid hoping..water??? cmon miguel!) so im like "no..are you kidding me? of course i didnt." so yeah.  i really needed to check.so .i walk around a corner..and DISGUSTING STUFF WILL NOW BE REVEALED, SO IF U WISH NOT TO CONTINUE, SKIP THE SEGMENT AFTER THIS WARNING AND CONTINUE AFTER THE NUMBER 7

so i stick my finger into my pants..and i start feeling around for a some poop..and lo and behold, my finger hits the jackpot..i feel a gel-like consistency on the bottom portion of my boxer briefs..so i take my finger out and look at it..there's no green smear like i expected..so i take a whiff of it..and it just smells like nothing..so im like. "hmm..maybe it IS just water.." but when i walk it feels like i have flubber in my boxers dancing around in between my ass-crack...so i tell my gf..that im gonna to the bathroom..and she decides to tag along..and by now..im walking like i just dropped the soap in alcatraz...so she asks me "miguel, are you sure, u didnt poop yourself? and with a smile, i say "no..i didnt."


7

so after walking around like i just got raped in the butt, i finally get to the bathroom..i slowly pull down my pants while saying "this cant be happening.."..and then i move on to pulling down the boxers..then!

then part 2 of the shart story shall continue another day..tune in.

Just checkin' in.

Imy and ily panget.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

i have never been more envious

READ IF YOU DARE.  IF YOU DO NOT AGREE WITH WHAT I HAVE TO SAY, REMEMBER: YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. AND BY NO MEANS AM I DEGRADING THE FOLLOWING PROFESSION. LASTLY, WE ARE ENTITLED TO OUR OWN OPINION. 

I have never felt so jealous in my life.  so i was on clinicals, on my medicine rotation and my pt is pretty complicated...i gotta increase certain IV drips of hers to get her blood pressure back to normal..so yeah..im like checking her blood pressure every 15 min..anyway, the clerk (4th year medical student) comes in the room and asks me, "how's my pateint?" im thinkin.."youre patient? ive been the one handlin this person for the last 4 hours..and i havent even seen ur mug this whole time."  anyways, i drop the 411 on him..and he's like.."ok..get his chart and meet me at the doctor's lounge"..so after getting his chart..i go to the lounge..and i see 2 AC machines, 2 couches, 2 electric fans, and all the clerks and residents just chillin..oh by the way..the temperature outside (where im workin) is about 89 degrees with like 80% humidity..it feels like an effin rain forest..haha..

back to what i was saying..i get inside there..and the air is nice and cold...quiet, and just relaxing..i look for the clerk that told me to meet him there..and i give him the chart....NOW, ...what ive noticed here in the philippines, is ppl will greet you whenever u enter a room..or even look at and nod their head.. but when i stepped into that lounge..the clerks, residents, attendings didnt even shoot a glance towards me..and why?  im not sure, but maybe coz im only a nurse.  but yeah..long story short..the clerk told me decrease the drip rate of certain side drips..and blah and blah..while i was regulating those drips outside in the rain forest, the clerk was just sitting there..enjoying a cool room..and chattin it up with other clerks.

 before i continue, i have to give some background info.  the nurses on duty at hospitals are intimidating sometimes...like..they have this aura about them..which i think is stupid..myself? i dont get really intimidated..why? coz, shit..theyre just a nurse..and doctors, they dont even act bad ass, or dominating when their in the ward with us, so why should the head nurse?it's like they have some power trip from being the "head nurse." anyways..i shall continue. when i was in the lounge, the "big bad head nurse" came in..and that aura of intimidation just disappeared once she entered the lounge..it was like..she was the big fish out in the rain forest, but when she entered the doctors lounge..she became a little gold fish. 

and after i stepped out of that room and saw the nurses in the rain forest..just jotting notes, giving drugs, and what not..i just felt like..my eyes were opened even wider...i just felt obsolete..i just felt like a worker bee..taking orders from ppl..busting my ass for someone who was just chillin in the ACed room..and seeing the nurses just acting all bad ass behind their little station made me pity them...


CALL ME COCKY..CALL ME ARROGANT
but i just cant wait to finish my bsn..and go on to med school..i wanna be the one calling the shots...i wanna be the captain of the plane..not the flight attendant..coz i know..i will make a damn good physician.

and finally.
i have deep respect for nurses and what they do. as i have said before..they are part of the health care team, and doctors wouldnt be able to do what they do without the nurses being around. so, once again, dont think im bashing the nursing profession.  i like nursing.  but let me put into a better perspective.  nursing is like the nissan 370z and a doctor is like a porsche 911 turbo...which are you gonna pick? 
 

it's all part of the plan.

all the mistakes. all the heart breaks. every single event that has happened in my life. lilo incident, the kairos incident, the "only applying to one university" incident coz of a girl, the grad night incident, the break up of 2006, the university of san francisco fall out, the air force incident- all that has led me to the task at hand..to graduate nursing school here. in the philippines.

all those stupid mistakes have me brought me this far.  i never really thought when i was in 5th grade that i would be here in the philippines 12 years later..graduating with a BSN, and moving on to medical school.  i somehow try to connect all the events that happened in my life before 'pines.  like, what if i did get into USF nursing program, would i have been motivated to pursue an M.D. afterwards? or..what if the break up of 2006 didnt occur? would i still be working at GNC and just hanging on to a burnt out romance? there are a lot of possibilities..but only one has remained.

these situations have led me to where i am now.  it has led me to pursuing my medical degree after my BSN.
i didnt get into USF because i believe i was destined for some greater purpose..i prly wouldve just settled as a nurse.  the 2006 break up had to occur..for me to turn cold..for me to become stone cold..to leave my family behind and pursue this career without missing home too much.

i thought all that has led to just my goals regarding my career.  but it has led me to something more.


it has all led me to her.  i love this girl, guys.  and i want it to work out. i want to bring her home.  i want to go grocery shopping with her. i wanna do all the little things that add up to being a big thing...i really think she's the one.

"uh oh..its getting serious with her now." yes. it's getting serious. i havent been goo goo eyed over a girl since..well u know who..haha. BUT even tho im head over heels for this girl..dont make the mistake of doubting my fire..my burning desire for that M.D. degree behind my name.  im old now. i know the mistakes ive made in the past.

i will complete medical school. even if this girl chooses to break my heart or not.  med school will happen.

..with or without her.

Know the unknown

I feel uneasy about you. I feel like I don't completely know you. Maybe it's just my paranoia creepin' in. Either way, I need to learn more about you.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

tnereffid

i was hoping i would be different.  i was hoping i was something more than your past. wait..i actually did think i was more than your past, but im not.

you say that our relationship is just the same as your other ones...which makes me question, why are you even in this relationship with me? if it's all the same, what makes this one so special?  u said we do the same things.."kwento kwento". fcuk..you still even wanna play the same games that you and ur ex played.  what if i started doing things that my exes and i did? what if i included that into our relationship? but that's a different story.

what makes this relationship so different? if it's the same as ur past ones..why be in this one? why dont u just go back to previous one?  he still loves you anyways..which brings me to my next topic..every time we get a good moment with each other..a text has to come from that guy..and no matter how many times u say, "ok..ill change my card." u never do.

what's the fckn difference in our relationship??? huh??? what??? if we make kwento kwento like ur other ones..then theyre all the same.

ive told you numerous times..how different you are compared to my past ones...and i know i shouldnt get all mad about you saying your past relationships are the same as ours, but i was hoping i would at least be different..even in the slightest possible way.

whatever tho.  it is what it is.

story about you.

hmm..i havent really had a good entry in awhile..i just havent been in a mood to write i guess.

if youve read my past entries..u notice i only write when im completely stressed out or just bothered..but for the past two months..i havent been stressed at all..w/c leads me to my next topic.

i have a new girlfriend..she's from here, the philippines. ive known her since november 2009..and i kinda crushed on her during december, and she crushed on me as well. but didnt wanna pursue it coz the "language barrier". then as you all know when i went back in late dec..i ran into some old ghosts..so in january i was pretty broken..but i was pickin myself back up..and my crush for my gf started to grow again, but i tried to think nothing of it..coz i didnt wanna get involved in another relationship..especially involving one with a clash of cultures.

around february..she gave up on me..coz i wasnt making any moves and she started to have a crush on this one guy. ill call him takla to maintain privacy..so yeah, takla.  she started to like takla..and immediately my heart started to race..my chest burned with jealousy..and i knew i had to make a move soon..or i was gonna lose her..in my head..i was like "f*ck this language barrier!".  so yeah. i pursued her..i had to step up my "descarte"..haha..that's "game" in tagalog. anyways..yeah..middle of feb..we started hanging out a lot..and all that..then finally on feb 25..we made it official..or so i thought! hahaha..apparently she didnt know that we were official on feb 25th, so i changed the date to feb 26th..hahaha.

ever since then..i havent looked back..there IS NO language barrier..we understand each other perfectly..we can even tell a story by just looking at each others eyes. at first..i thought this relationship was just gonna be like a small thing..like u know..we go out for awhile, then after graduation..it's done..

BUT NO! ..our story will go on..our story will go on after nursing..after medical school...our story will go on until time itself ends.

ive met my match..she has the wits, the charm, the looks, the brains, the smile, the eyes, and more importantly, she has tamed me. this girl..she has so much pride, it almost matches my level..coz, u see? i never really apologize to girls..i dk..even if i know im wrong..i still dont apologize..but this girl..it's like..i wanna apologize..i want to say sorry to her..

i love this girl..and im not ashamed to post it on my blog..or tell the whole world.